And conversely, why are uninteresting people uninteresting?
First things first. Before I set out on an escapade of writing about people whom I find interesting, I need to set up a bit of structure for the discussion, and am asking for your help as well.
Let's start with the title question, because the question about uninteresting people will be answered as a result. What is it that interesting people have and do which makes them interesting? At this point, I am not talking about what they do in terms of profession or hobby, as I think an assembly line worker or store clerk or a rocket scientist can all be interesting.
What I mean is, what is it that makes us attracted to them?
I'll start the list.
1. Interesting people are good listeners.
2. Interesting people never think they know everything. There is nothing more boring than a know-it-all, after all.
3. An interesting person shares his or her knowledge with you in a way that does not make you feel stupid or lectured to.
4. Interesting people don't spend time talking about the details of their lives in extreme minutiae (unless asked) or bragging about their accomplishments. Interesting people don't have to say how great they are, even in an underhanded way. They can tell you what they have done in a way which will hold your attention -- for hours!
5. Interesting people understand very often the value of leisure and of taking time for themselves and others (which is one of the reasons, quite possibly, why so many Italians seem interesting).
6. Interesting people are interested in others.
7. Interesting people are intellectually curious.
8. Interesting people are rarely jealous, at least not in a way which consumes them.
9. Interesting people are not butt-kissers, and do not change their colors to fit the needs of their audience.
10. Interesting people often make the most of the opportunities given to them.
Ok, now it's your turn. What, in your estimation, makes a person interesting?
10 comments:
Provocative question. Unfortunately, I am unable to separate the question of an interesting person from the idea of the person whom *I* would find interesting (whom others might find quite boring!).
One thing I would add is that the person has a certain passion or more specialized knowledge in a field that's of interest to me . . it doesn't have to be one of my exact favorites, but tangential at least . . .and, most important, a kind of infectious enthusiasm for that interest or subject area that allows them to communicate about it in the ways that you mentioned (i.e. humbly).
Also if I think about my friends (because certainly I surround myself with interesting people!) I think of wit, and a quick wit as that. An ability to assess/satirize/see the pretenses and to do so in a humorous way.
I'm curious to see if these fit in with your analysis.
Also empathy. . . . which is related also to humility and modesty.
Yes, I would definitely add a sense of humour to your list, the ability to laugh or at least smile at themselves is a good quality. People who take themselves too seriously are never very interesting to me. I think a little dose of eccentricity is always interesting, the world needs people who are slightly different from the norm to keep it vital, don't you think?
I find myself shaking my head furiously at these comments ladies. Yes. Humor. Wit. Empathy. Passion. Self-irony. A splash of eccentricity.
I hope the ideas keep coming. This is interesting! HA!
I'm interested in people who are truly comfortable in their own skin. I find that fascinating and I tend to find them interesting to be around.
Agreed, Dana, absolutely.
I agree with all the above, especially humor. I’m also drawn to people who 'step out of the box' and make changes or take chances in their lives that 98% of the world would never do. I find these people very interesting as they bring a lot of unique experiences to the table.
Diana, like you and Micha moving to Italy and opening up a B&B, that took a lot of hard work, courage, money, not to mention risk. I could spend days talking with you about it and picking your brain.
Great question.
I was up in the middle of the night with a major migraine last night pondering this question. I had a brilliant idea but of course forgot my idea when I woke up the next morning.
I'll still give it a try though. I would have to say that for me the person would need to be intelligent and would need to have talents or knowledge about topics or areas that would be of interest to me. I guess like friends, we are drawn to some people and not to others at least partly because of common interests although I guess at times it can be said that opposites attract.
I guess my brain is just mush at the moment after way too many migraines lately. If I wake up again with that brainstorm, I will grab my laptop and add another comment :)
happy people, people who live the life they want to live.
people who enjoy themselves.
people who do the things they want to do in the way they choose to do it.
There is too much unhapiness, not always for a reason, it's like for most of the people it's easier to feel unhappy than to make an effort to be happy.
Today I read that they killed someone for not wanting to stop singing in a karaoke bar. Can you imagine, people are so unhappy that they get outrageous for someone who sings to much.
I was a psychologist in 'my former life', maybe I saw too much unhappiness and that's why now I want to see happy people, listen to positive stories, ...
Diana, you mentioned "A splash of eccentricity". That is a quality that makes a person interesting to me. They are not cut from the same mold - they are a little different. From what I have read about Marlena DeBlasi, she fits the bill in that regard.
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